As if to defy the ruling logic of Elbortopian Leftist Dinosaurs, the sun rose again today. Mother Gaia continued to spin the earth underneath the sacred alluvium that supports beloved Elbortopia, and brought our little patch of heaven into the light once again.
Elder Dinos predicted we would not see this future day. They told us that only the sacred statutory zoning scrolls of Elbortopia would satisfy Gaia and persuade that mother to keep the earth spinning.
But the earth did spin, and the sun did rise. And seeing how Mother Gaia insulted their efforts and debased the sacred zoning scrolls by allowing the sun to rise on non-compliant Elbortopia, the Dinos lashed out at themselves, for they had been found impure and repugnant to Mother Gaia.
They performed the ritual sacrifice of the BOCC to cleanse the altar of county edicts with the blood of a high priest, and to tell that Mother Gaia that they would redouble their efforts, and they would earn her sanctification of the statutory zoning scrolls.
And the earth spun round another day, and the sun rose again. And the lamentations from the Elbortopian Dinos formed a mighty whirlwind in the sky above Elbortopia, sweeping through the forests and glens whence they dwelled. And the whirlwind called to them in the voice of Mother Gaia, and told them that their work was not finished.
It told them that the sacred zoning scrolls were not complete and that it was still possible for Elbortopians to act in life without defined rules. It told them that Elbortopia would fall into chaos when Mother Gaia, enraged over their impurities and impieties, polluted the waters of alluvium beneath their feet, and fouled the pure air they needed to breathe. It told them that only the sacred statutory scrolls could save them from the assaults to their ears, the offenses to their eyes, and the defilements of their beloved Elbortopian land.
And the Elbortopian Dinos found renewal in their faith. And they met. And again they met, over and over and over, for the sacred zoning scrolls did not reveal their holy content without great effort. And the Elbortopian Dinos found pleasure in this effort, for their striving assured them that their quest was indeed holy and pleasing to Mother Gaia.
And the earth spun round another day, and the sun rose again, and the BOCC blood on the altar of county edicts turned to dust and blew away in the whirlwind. And the cycles of holy work on the zoning scrolls continued for many years in Elbortopia because the Dinos could think of nothing else to do. The voice of Mother Gaia in the whirlwind spoke to them in a tongue that only they could understand. And having heard her siren song, the Elbortopian Dinos would hear no other.
And the earth spun round day after day, the sun still rose again, and work on the sacred scrolls never ended.